Monday, July 30, 2012

The Phone Call

I woke up this morning wondering if today would be the day. I knew what I had in and what I had coming in to my partnership fund, but I couldn't do anything until I had the official word from TeachBeyond. I've been visiting friends in South Florida all weekend and as much fun as I've been having, the thought still loomed "When?"

I got the phone call today that gave me that official word. August 7th I'll be flying to Germany! It still seems surreal. Literally, as soon as I heard the news, a rush of excitement flowed through me followed by a wave of exhaustion. I haven't slept well, especially in the last few weeks. I'm constantly wondering "When?" Tonight, I plan on sleeping like a baby.

I'm asking those of you reading to please continue praying and thinking of my friends who are still waiting on their final amount to come in so they can get the same phone call I received today.

8 days.

Sunday, July 29, 2012

Promises

A devotion my friend Liz gave me this weekend. Quite appropriate, don't you think? July 28   For if the inheritance be of the law, it is no more of promise: but God gave it to Abraham by promise. Galatians 3:18   It was when Abraham had no children that God told him his offspring would number as the stars of the sky, as the sand on the seashore. But Scripture records that Abraham believed God anyway. ‘Okay, Lord,’ Abraham replied, ‘I don’t know how You’re going to do it, but if You want to bless me in that way, it’s fine with me.’ And God said, ‘That’s the faith that will justify you, Abraham — just believing in Me.’ Some time went by. Again, the Lord appeared to Abraham. ‘I am your shield and your great reward,’ He said. ‘That’s great, Lord,’ answered Abraham, ‘but I still don’t have any kids. The years are going by, and I’m not getting any younger.’ ‘Abraham,’ said the Lord, ‘let’s cut covenant.’ In Abraham’s day, when two parties wanted to seal an agreement, they would cut an animal in half and meet each other in the middle, thereby saying, ‘We’re dead serious about this.’ So Abraham got a bullock, cut it in half, laid it out, and sat there waiting for God to show up. He waited, and waited, and waited, wondering where God was. When birds started swarming around the carcass, with stick in hand, Abraham stood up and shooed them away. Time passed, Abraham’s eyes grew heavy. He head started bobbing, then slumping, and finally he was out. Sometime later, he awoke, looked at the bullock, and saw it had been barbecued. God had come when Abraham was asleep and had moved all the way through the carcass. God didn’t meet Abraham halfway. He did the whole thing, saying, ‘Abraham, this promise I’m giving you is not based upon your agreeing with Me and doing your part. No, I’m going to do it all, and I’ll even do it while you’re asleep.’ (see Genesis 15) God still does it all, precious people. Your salvation, the blessings which are poured upon you, the work of the Spirit which flows through you in ministry — it’s all God. ‘Don’t I have any part to play?’ you ask. Yes. Your part is to shoo away the birds of unbelief that will invariably come and pick at the promises of God’s Word. Whatever God said He will do is an accomplished fact — yet vultures of doubt, and buzzards of cynicism will come and say, ‘God’s not going to use you. He’s not going to bless you. You haven’t been praying enough.’ Peck, peck, peck. Your part is to chase away those birds by saying, ‘Lord, You told us You would supply all our needs according to Your riches. You told us You would never leave us or forsake us. You told us You’re preparing a place in Heaven for us. You told us You would give the Holy Ghost to us. Thank You, Lord.’

Monday, July 23, 2012

Can I Just Be Completely Honest?

It's Monday. I'm leaving (supposedly) 2 weeks from tomorrow. This weekend, I began to feel low. Stressed. Vulnerable. Anxious. Why? Because I was relying on myself. Again.

I was relying on myself to raise the 16% left for the ticket. I was putting it all on ME. It was about ME. And the thing is, with support raising, it's NOT. ABOUT. ME.

Yesterday, three more people committed to give monthly. And I didn't have to do anything. Why is it so hard for us to just sit back and let God do his thing? Because we're relinquishing control. It's simple enough to state that. It's simple enough to say, "I'm going to let God take control." Yet, when we do that, we all too quickly take it back. "No, God, you're really not big enough."  "No, God, you can't physically talk to these people like I can."  "No, God, just let me do my thing because you're too slow."  We don't voice this (or maybe you do, but I don't think I've ever voiced it aloud). But by our actions and by our stress levels, we definitely, deep down, begin to act like it.

It's not only with support raising, it's with anything in our lives that we do. Our reputation. Our identity. Our jobs. Even as I type this, as much as I wholeheartedly believe what I'm telling you, I'm also freaking out because the time frame is winding down. 2 weeks. TWO WEEKS.

We serve a God with no time frame. That's all I really need to remember.

15 days.

Friday, July 20, 2012

A Scandalous Freedom & Other Books

My friend Tony is always posting about books he's reading, so I figured I'd copy him (thanks, Pags!) and fill you in a fantastic book I'm in the middle of:


This author tells it like it is. He doesn't sugar coat anything and he reminds us all that we are all scared of freedom and we'd rather live up to man's rules for us. In other words, we'd rather be legalistic than revel in the freedom given to us by our Father.

And then, after you finish this one, go get this one:


I think the title is pretty self-explanatory. But you're still in for a great time reading anything by Tullian Tchividjian ;)


Thursday, July 19, 2012

Looking Ahead

...teaching Music & Drama
...small groups with teens
...bonding with students
...speaking German
...the congregation and worship at the Anglican Church in Basel
...new friends
...old friends
...walks in the Schwarzwald
...continual pruning
...weekends spent in Basel
...bike rides to France
...lesson planning
...studying in cafes
...watching as God works all of it out according to HIS plan.

Wednesday, July 18, 2012

Waiting

I have never been patient. It's a flaw and something I struggle with daily. But 3 weeks from today, I am hoping to be on a plane headed to Germany and I'm still lacking in the money needed to get that ticket. I'm frustrated and impatient, I'll be honest. I want it now so I can feel more permanently ready. If you read my last post, you know that I'm not alone in this and there are at least 51 other people who are going through the same type of frustrations. But in all of this, ALL of it, God. Is. Sovereign. He's not sitting up in Heaven, shaking his head and going, "Well, dang Allison, I just don't know how you're going to get there!" No. He's with me and encouraging me silently, whispering, "Daughter, I have this. It's not up to you. It is my timing and my timing is perfect." Even the day before the money is supposed to be in and it's not. His timing is perfect.

So I'll just continue to wait and watch to see what He's going to do.

21 days.

Wednesday, July 11, 2012

Encouragers

Meeting new friends at Orientation 2 weeks ago was great not only for making connections, but it also helped me realize that all of us there were working through the same fears and frustrations of fundraising and partnering. I've been catching up on my friends' blogs and there is one common theme: we're all in this together and relying on our Father to provide what we are lacking.

27 days.

Keep praying.

Tuesday, July 10, 2012

Less than a Month (potentially!)

Today is July 10th. In 4 weeks, I should be posting a blog from Germany. I've already imagined what I think my apartment will look like, what I musical numbers I envision doing, and what life will look like. It's hard to believe that in 4 weeks, God willing, I will be back in a place that I have felt called to since I returned from it 4 years ago.

Please continue praying. Please continue to ask questions. I would love for you to be a part of this journey. I am blessed by your gifts and your prayers! I look forward to the day I am able to post that I have purchased my plane ticket :)


Friday, July 6, 2012

Pictures from Orientation

Nearly a week ago, Orientation ended on a happy note. I am really going to enjoy the people I get to work with over in Germany! I also met many new friends who are serving in other countries around the world. Here's a few pics from last week. Enjoy!

Sharon, Amy, Jennifer, Elizabeth, me, & Rachel. We're all headed to Germany!

Amy, me, & Annika. Amy and I will be serving at BFA and Annika at CISP in Prague!


Amy, Rachel, me, & Elizabeth 

New BFA Teaching Faculty!

New TeachBeyond Staff!


Me and Katie, who will be going to serve in Bolivia!

Sunday, July 1, 2012

What I Need When I Need It

This journey isn't about tangible, it's about trust. It's about learning what faith, real faith, looks like. In my mind, 6 weeks seems imPossible to raise the remainder of my support. After being in Orientation, I'm ready for what these next few weeks holds, but I'm also a little terrified. I know in my head that God will provide as He always has, but I want to see it sooner than later. I want it to be next week so that I can get my plane ticket and start winding down the rest of my summer. But there's always a lesson. There's always something else God wants to show me. So I'm waiting on Him, ever mindful that He is in the business of providing in the nick of time. Please continue to pray.